When a relationship ends, emotions are often intense and complicated. Especially when there are children involved, separated parents face a new challenge: learning to communicate well. Staying kind and respectful towards each other can be hard when there’s a history of pain and conflict, but that’s exactly when it matters most to put the children first. Staying kind is an important step towards a healthy, stable future for your children, and for yourself. But yes… that’s easier said than done, isn’t it?


Communicate kindly and respectfully, with the children in mind

As parents, you play a big part in your children’s wellbeing and development, even when you’re no longer together. For children, parents are a source of safety and stability, and that doesn’t change when their parents split up. What does change is the way that stability has to be protected.

As separated parents, you first of all have your own emotions to deal with, and let’s be honest: those emotions are very real. Just try keeping them under control, both of you. On top of that, there are your child’s emotions and wellbeing to consider. Children pick up on tension between their parents unerringly. You’ve probably caught yourself saying that “everything’s fine” or “nothing’s wrong”. But you also know that children feel far more than you might first think. By making a conscious effort to stay kind and respectful towards the other parent, you give your child room to feel safe.

Avoid negative remarks

Children are generally loyal to both parents and find it hard when you speak negatively about the other one. Negative remarks can confuse and hurt a child. They feel they have to “take sides”, when all they want is to love both parents without feeling guilty.

By consciously avoiding negative remarks about the other parent, you create a safe, loving environment for your child. Even if staying kind sometimes feels like a struggle, remember that it has an enormous impact on how your child sees you both. But how do you do that?

Be Nice

Because we know how hard it is to keep your emotions in check and keep communicating “kindly”, we developed BeNice.
BeNice is here to help! Using advanced AI technology, we filter long-winded, unkind messages and turn them into clear, neutral and constructive communication! And more!
In the end, it all comes down to one simple idea: be nice. For your children, for yourself and even for your ex. It isn’t always easy, but it’s the key to a more harmonious relationship and a happier life for you and your children. Staying kind doesn’t mean ignoring your own feelings. It means choosing to act in the interest of a positive, healthy family life, whatever shape it takes. It’s a choice for kindness and respect. You set your children a valuable example that will shape their whole lives for the better.

So the next time tension rises, remind yourself of these words:

Be Nice.